Chapter 1: Stage 1

The time approached nine-thirty in the morning. While the sun was hovering in a cloudless sky, the air was still somewhat cool, a welcome change from the normally-sweltering badlands of New Mexico. Still, there was no reason to be hanging around outside at the moment. While the seemingly-random collection of rundown buildings was far from inviting, one could sense that some of them were filled with men plotting a grand scheme or two.

Hidden away in a thought-to-be-unusable mining shaft, eight men dressed in blue milled about, preparing themselves for the day of work ahead. The youngest ran about willy-nilly, stretching out his legs. The Australian inspected his equipment for cleanliness. The Scotsman enjoyed a cold refreshment. The leader was sketching something on a blackboard. The Frenchman scrolled through his inventory, checking its functionality. The muscleman ensured that his lunch was still there. The medic ensured that his equipment was charged. The last man appeared to be doing nothing, though it was likely he was simply daydreaming of what was to come.

In the back of the bunker sat two interesting devices. The first autonomously manufactured, stored, and dispensed the various materials that would be useful for the upcoming day's work, while the second was the quantum transportation device used to initially get everyone into the bunker without being seen. Presently, a ninth man appeared out of nowhere, standing on the revolving teleporter with a toolbox in one hand and a large wrench in the other. Satisfied with everyone now being present, he walked off to place his toolbox down by the dispensing device.

"Alright men," the leader called, "let's get this briefing underway." He adjusted his overlarge helmet to no practical effect as everyone started gathering around.

The man with the wrench was about to join the others, but no sooner than he lifted one foot off the ground, the spinning teleporter began to wobble, spark, and make dangerous-sounding noises.

"Dammit!" He retrieved a handheld control device as if from nowhere and began pressing several buttons in a distinct pattern, looking up midway to see if there was any improvement. There was none; the teleporter continued to get further off-kilter and burst into flames.

"Aw, hell." He shielded his face with his gloved hand as the teleporter crashed, releasing a cloud of smoke and bluish quantum fiber particles as it stopped moving entirely. Once the afterglow had subsided, he turned to survey the damage.

He dropped both his wrench and his control device in shock.

"Oh my god."

Irritated at the delay, the leader called again. "C'mon Engie, I haven't got all day."

The Engineer shook his head as he turned to respond. "If'n you can hold your horses for just a damn second, soldier boy, I got a teleporter malfunction to deal with. An' it is a doozy."

The Soldier dismissively waved his hand; he didn't like having to delay, but there was no way they could succeed without functioning equipment.

The Engineer cautiously walked over to the teleporter. Or more specifically, the person that had fallen out of it when it crashed. He'd seen this kind of thing before; teleporters were the most finnicky of his buildings, and occasionally crashed for no rhyme or reason, leaving whoever was trying to use it dazed and confused (and sometimes not teleported at all). But this time around was different, because there wasn't supposed to be anyone else coming through, or even aware of the entrance's existence.

And that didn't even consider the person's appearance: a young lady wearing lavender and blue with high-class gloves and stockings, silver hair, what looked to be a wooden carving attached to her belt, and a pair of white wings attached to her head. The Engineer's first instinct was that she had been fused with a bird somehow as part of the teleporter accident, but previous cases of such fusing were always much more gruesome and not nearly as perfectly symmetrical.

He didn't want to get too close and startle her, but he did need her to wake up so he could ask what had happened on her side. Picking his trusty wrench back up, he tapped the nearest support beam with it to make a dull wooden sound. It was enough to get her to start moving. After looking around and realising she was clearly not where she expected to be, she quickly jumped to her feet and grabbed the wooden object on her belt, which had somehow extended into a quarterstaff, and addressed the nearest person.

"Where am I?" she asked, trying to find a midpoint between forceful and respectful. "What is this place?"

The Engineer was expecting the question, but not the posh pronunciation, which threw him for a loop for a few seconds. As far as he knew, the British monarchy had no access to teleporter technology, nor a not-quite-human daughter.

"Well ma'am, this is an industrial compound somewhere in the southwestern United States." He wasn't sure how much he could reveal to an outsider, but he had to help somehow.

The girl shook her head, distrustful of the unfamiliar accent. "Those words mean nothing to me. Where am I in relation to Eryth Sea?"

It was the Engineer's turn to look confused, though his welding goggles masked it somewhat. "I ain't no geography major, but that's just as foreign a name to me."

"Then perhaps you could at least explain what has happened to bring me here." No longer firmly in panic mode, she re-collapsed her staff to portable size and replaced it on her belt.

"Let's see if I can." The Engineer gathered his PDA and began running some diagnostics on the crashed teleporter. "I just need to know one thing: What was the last thing you were doing before this happened?"

"I was utilising a transporter pad."

"Bingo, that makes things easier." He continued to press buttons to dig through the logs. He'd had this happen once before: two separate teleporter systems had mixed signals, sending his teammate into enemy territory and bringing an enemy into their base. He installed some new software to try and fix the issue, but apparently there was another possibility he'd overlooked.

"Alrighty then ma'am, here's the deal. From the looks of things, our two teleporter systems hitched up somehow and got all cross-eyed. You stepped onto your end and came outta our end."

She nodded. "I see." She'd never been part of a transporter malfunction before, but had heard stories of all kinds of unexpected events when circumstances were set up perfectly wrong.

"So the good news is, it's a pretty easy fix. I got all the info here that tells me exactly what went wrong, so I know just how to fix it, send you back, and hopefully stop it from happenin' again." He paused and looked over towards the Soldier, still waiting impatiently. "But now for the bad news. It's a simple fix, but not a quick one. It'll take me about...twenty, thirty minutes. And the fact is, I don't have that kinda time right now."

"What could be more important than rectifying this incident?"

"Well, uh..." The Engineer started fidgeting, unsure exactly how much he was allowed to say. "I'm under contract to do a job, and we're gonna start in about five minutes. If you want to know exactly what it's about...well, you might as well listen in on the briefing. If Soldier lets you, that is. He's a bit...uh, closed-minded." He looked back over. "I oughta get over there, they're lookin' impatient."

He started walking towards the others. The young lady stood still for a moment, unsure what to do, before deciding to follow.

The briefing was being held in the front of the bunker. A staircase leading to the surface was close by, with what looked like a medicine cabinet near its foot, and a tunnel that led in the same general direction. The rest of the blue-clad men were hanging around, waiting.

The Soldier was grumpy. "Who's this?" He pointed at the girl, drawing everyone's attention to her.

"This is..." The Engineer realized he didn't know. "What's your name again?"

"My name is Melia."

The Engineer explained the situation. "We've had a teleporter malfunction that crossed into who knows where, and I'm afraid she's stuck with us until I have enough time to fix it."

"A civilian trapped in a war zone? Just what we don't need." The Soldier chomped on his cigar. "I have no beef with your posh patoot, but if you get in our way you'll be seeing that headdress of yours in a museum! Any objections, lady?"

Taken aback by the attitude, Melia simply shook her head. The Soldier scowled and turned to everyone else.

"Now then! Thanks to yesterday's success at Doublecross Ditch, we have obtained invaluable intelligence regarding the RED team's dastardly plans! More specifically, the location of a RED base, which we're standing just outside of right now! And why are we here?"

He opened a nearby red briefcase, took a photo out of it, and held it up for all to see.

"THIS, men! It is a rocket! We don't know why it's here, we don't know what it's for, but by GOD we won't let those RED pukeballs use it for whatever their plans are, no sir! And that is why we have Capture Plan Dustbowl!"

He pointed to the blackboard. The left side was a carefully-drawn map in white of three interlocking areas, with blue and red arrows and other icons drawn to mark points of interest. The right side was labelled "Capture Plan Dustbowl" in a hasty all-caps scrawl, with the plan being listed as: 1. Take RED pansies by surprise. 2. Kill them all. 3. Take over points. 4. Loot.

The Soldier started to point to relevant areas of the map while talking. "Spy has identified a total of six control computers, supported by a total of three respawn rooms. So, our goal is to capture the control computers two at a time, take over the respawn room, and push further into the base. Once we have all six, the base is OURS, and we will fire that cursed rocket fifty miles out from here into an empty salt flat were those RED crazies can't recover it!"

There was a smattering of applause from the rest of the team.

"So! Since we only got this intel yesterday, we're pretty sure those RED maggots don't think we'll be here yet. I expect to take the first point without trouble. If they're not busy sleeping with their baby bears and thumbs in their mouths, they'll probably show up at point two, like it'll do them any good. After that, they'll have a chance to fortify defenses while we take over the respawn room, so we'll discuss further strategy then."

Everyone nodded.

"Now, just in case those RED meatbags ARE somehow waiting for us, here's the plan of attack for the first point. Sniper, you hold 'em down from this crevice in the middle here. Scout, Engie, and Spy, you come out from the right flank and support from there. Pyro, you do whatever the hell it is you do, I don't care. The rest of us will be pushing up the left side into the building. I want Heavy to go in first, so Medic, stay on him. Demo, try throwing some stickies in the upper floor on the right side there, if there's a sentry that's where it'll be. Once we take the first point, we'll head up and into the left side, where there's a good spot for a forward base."

It seemed like the team didn't really need to be told any of this, but they agreed regardless.

"We move out in two minutes. Go!"

The meeting broke up as everyone started moving to the correct exits.

Somewhat overwhelmed by all she had just heard, Melia tailed the Engineer as he packed up his Dispenser. She wasn't completely sure, but she suspected that things were about to get violent.

"Excuse me, but is anyone other than you capable of repairing your transporter?"

The Engineer shrugged. "'Fraid not, ma'am. Anyone else would be lucky to operate it when it's workin'."

"Then...what happens if you get injured and cannot work?"

"Heh. That won't be happenin'. You saw our Medic, right? Anything happens to any one of us, he'll fix us up good as new faster than you can say "I'm in need of medical attention"."

Melia thought for a moment.

"Is there any way I can assist you? To finish your task faster, so I can return sooner?"

The Engineer's face went grim at the suggestion. "This ain't some training exercise, ma'am. We're up against people just like us, armed with the same real guns as we are, and I don't think they'll have mercy in the heat of battle. I don't mean to offend you, but I wouldn't last three seconds if one o' their big guys saw me out there, and I'm a sight more bulky than you are."

Melia instinctively became huffy. "Excuse me, I am not as weak as I appear. I-"

"I ain't sayin' you should or shouldn't come along. Heck, we could always use another member on our side, reliable or not. I'm just sayin' that I'm protected under contract if anything happens, and you ain't. The choice is yours."

With everyone else ready to go, the Engineer picked up his toolbox and headed down the rightmost tunnel. Not long afterwards, Melia heard the swish of several gates opening all at once, followed by many footsteps of the team receding. A single volley of gunfire was heard.

I can't just wait here for them to finish their task. Melia cautiously wandered down the right tunnel to see that it made a left turn down a railed corridor. Based on the lack of sound, any conflict that is occurring seems to be minimal. It must be safe enough to at least observe.

She continued down the tunnel to reach the exit. Peering through a shack on the right, she heard a bell as most of the blue team exited a building further off, heading down the topmost and leftmost of three tunnels in the far rock face.

The leader said they would be advancing on the left into a building, and they are just now leaving a building. They must have completed the first task and are advancing. Therefore, this area must be secure. Confident in her logic, Melia stepped out from behind the shack.

Something immensely loud blew by her left ear, followed by a reddish trail in the air.

"AAAAH!" She clumsily dove back behind the shack.

Having just arrived to the right tunnel, the RED team's Sniper stood with a stunned look on his face.

"What the bloody hell was that?" He thought he had seen a short girl with wings on her head walk out in front of his scope, which messed up his aim. He looked back through his scope and hoped he would get another shot.

Instead, he felt something in his back.

Melia sat with her back against the shack, hyperventilating. Clear intent to aim for the head; only luck saved me. She took several deep breaths and calmed down. I am not making the same mistake again. Always have defences prepared when going into unfamiliar territory.

Extending her staff, she focused her ether energy to summon an earth elemental, an orange cube of defensive energy that hovered over her head. To be safe, she created a second one, followed by producing a purple nexus of electrical energy. Mentally controlling the bolt, she fired it around the corner, across the landscape, and down the tunnel where the enemy had been. She could sense it hit the back wall and dissipated.

No hit. The rifleman must have left, perhaps to support the rest of his team.

Spotting two boxes of supplies in the shack, she tossed them out the side door in an attempt to draw attention. Nothing happened. She carefully stuck the head of her staff out the door; still nothing happened. Finally, she stepped out of the shack into the open. No one was around.

I don't want to stay out in the open. I should remain in the tunnels, where I cannot be outranged. Melia dashed into the tunnel on the right, which opened into a room that also contained two packages of supplies. Sounds of a proper fight were now audible.

I should be able to keep control of this room; I can cover all three entrances with-

"AUUGH!" The Soldier had arrived through the door on the left, but immediately fell to the ground and stopped moving. The reason was obvious: his entire body was on fire.

Now realising what the scattered supplies were for, Melia picked up the square-shaped blue health pack and started carrying it over to the Soldier, expecting to find something within that could get him back on his feet. However, she was interrupted by an ominous shadow approaching from the same door the Soldier had entered from - whatever had set him alight was pursuing, and it looked like it had a dragon's head.

Melia didn't want anything to do with the incoming threat, and to be completely honest it looked like the Soldier was past help anyways. She booted the health pack back where she got it from and scrambled up the stairs on the right just as the RED team's Pyro entered the room. In contrast to the BLU team's Pyro, who had just a rubber glove attached to his head, the RED Pyro was decked out to be menacing, with an angular mask and spiked black armbands and collar. Seeing no one but his most recent kill, he sprayed the area with flames a bit before turning back.

At the exit door at the top of the stairs, Melia could see the BLU team's Sniper across the way, with various other flashes of blue suggesting that most of the team was gathered up in the tunnel behind him. She could probably reach them by walking across the bridge that connected the wooden near side with the rocky far side, but based on how the Sniper was covering himself, it was a path that cut straight through the line of fire.

The blue team has concentrated their efforts on the opposite side of this building. She looked to the right where the enemy presumably was; a pile of crates perched on the edge of the rooftop provided the perfect cover. I should be able to provide a minor distraction while remaining safe.

Keeping low to the ground, she sidled up to the crates and peeked through a crack between them. Positioned against a circular building was a red gun turret with at least twelve gun barrels and four rocket tubes, actively scanning the area. Just behind it appeared to be someone reclining on a chair.

A stationary target. Mechanical, but not invincible. Melia shuffled her two earth elementals around to ensure they wouldn't give her position away before summoning a bolt, which she lobbed over the crates to strike the sentry gun.

"Wha?" The RED Engineer, wearing a black hat and button-up trenchcoat, was roused from his relaxation as the gear in his welding glasses informed him that his sentry had just taken 50 damage. Confused as to what the source of the damage was, he looked around but saw no enemies.

Another. Melia summoned and discharged a second bolt for the same effect, then peeked through the gap in the crates to see the results.

"If that ain't..." Snarling, the Engineer got up off his chair and repaired the damage with one swing of his spiked wrench. He then turned to the RED Soldier, who was collecting some rockets from the dispenser in behind. "Soldier, you see that? Someone's shootin' some kinda ball lightning at mah sentry. You think you could-AWHUH!"

Melia had launched a fiery elemental this time, which exploded on contact with the sentry to deal a critical 50 damage to the Engineer and set him on fire, but only did a paltry 20 damage to the sentry itself.

"Yeah, I saw it." The Soldier adjusted his black, three-starred helmet. "You keep our defenses topped up. I'll handle this."

The Engineer nodded as he repaired the minor damage and stepped back to his dispenser.

The rules of this world are even stranger than I could have guessed. Melia tried to make sense of her damage output. I expected my ether attacks to deal halved damage to mechanical targets, but for this one to be also immune to afterburn and even critical hits? That's unheard of.

Suddenly, she sensed something. Her ether awareness was telling her that a nearby antagonistic being had spotted her and was aggroing in. She didn't see anyone wearing red until she looked up - someone who looked just like the Soldier was falling from the sky, holding a folding shovel with olive-coloured accents. There was no time to react before he smacked her with it and the world instantly went black.

"Got 'im?" The RED Engineer had topped himself up and was back in his chair.

"Got her." The Soldier put away his melee weapon. "Some sort of wizard girl; a lot fancy-pantsier than that hobo coot Merasmus."

"Well don't that beat all. Bring 'er down here, we'll study her once the lockdown is finished."

"Will do. C'mere, you." He bent down to pick up the strange newcomer.

Instead, he got a slap in the face.

"What in..." The Soldier stared in astonishment as Melia very slowly picked up her staff, her earth elementals lifting back up off the floor. The defensive aura they radiated, combined with her commitment to reliability, was just barely enough to protect her from the massive package of physical damage that had just been inflicted.

"No creature of your size that walks on God's earth should survive what I just did to you. I am taking no chances." He reached behind himself and somehow extracted a rocket launcher, shining a blazing golden color in the cloudless day. "Say your prayers, mutant wizard girl."

There was an explosion nearby as the BLU Soldier flew up onto the roof, whacking the RED one with his own Market Gardener, dropping him in one hit. "Have a taste of your own medicine, hippie!" He pointed towards Melia. "Don't think I did this to save you."

Melia was now massively confused. Now she had seen three of the same person - first one wearing blue who died by fire earlier, then one wearing red that had it out for her, and now another wearing blue that looked exactly like the first and had memory of her. The only possible explanation was that the two blue ones were the same person somehow. "But...but...but I saw you die mere minutes ago!"

"I do not have permission to die!" Picking up the enemy's dropped weapon, he fired a rocket over the crates that launched with an electric crackle and trailed blue smoke, impacting the ground nearby the red sentry with a thunderclap and spattering sound. He followed it up with two rockets at the sentry itself, which destroyed it easily. "Move, move, move!"

The gates leading to the tunnel across the bridge opened, with the blue team's Demoman and Medic leading the charge. Holding what looked to be a tube with a tank attached to it, the Demoman's weapon glowed blue and sparked with power as he fired a series of glittering balls towards the enemy team. As each projectile exploded and turned the red team into red chunks, more and more of the blue team spilled out of the tunnel and towards the nearby building. It didn't take long for the bell of success to ring once more.

"Two points down, four to go!" The Soldier jumped down from the roof and headed right with the rest of the team, heading towards the respawn room so they could begin converting it into their possession.

The BLU Engineer, who had stayed behind to ensure his base in the tunnel wouldn't be taken out on the sly, crossed the bridge and crouched down next to Melia. "Learnin' what's up the hard way, I see."

Melia slowly got to her feet, now having summoned a water elemental to gradually replenish her energy. "I...I do not know what I expected, but a war between factions of immortal twins was not it."

The Engineer chuckled. "If you're gonna fight alongside us, ma'am, y'all need to be told a few things. C'mon, we'll patch you up in the room."

He jumped off the roof and followed the rest of the team. Still winded, Melia carefully lowered herself down and landed clumsily before following.

Two control points further away, the RED team was gathered in their second respawn room. They were quite upset at their failure to hold the territory, the Soldier the most so.

"...And as if THAT was not bad enough, we have found out that those good-for-nothing BLU worms have somehow hired some sort of mutant wizard bird girl onto their team! She was throwing balls of fire and lightning at our sentry, and when I went to clean her up, she survived my Market Gardener before I was hit with a cheap shot! Girl or not, this extra enemy is no joker!"

"Why don't y'all calm down, Soldier." The Engineer was looking over a set of blueprints. "If'n we're okay with a bit of a lighter defense on point three, I got just the ticket to even the odds a bit."

The Soldier considered. He didn't like the idea of intentionally losing even more territory; the more control points they lost, the less computer power they'd have available for launching the rocket, and the more time the enemy team would have to continue their assault. But this was clearly a unique situation that may very well call for a unique plan.

"Okay greasemonkey, the floor is yours. Don't disappoint me."